The Myth of the Manly Man

I got in this conversation with a co-worker the other day about the world’s view of how a man should be. He is a believer as well and knows the crap we have to go through while trying to grow up.

The problem is the world has told us that that a man is strong and quiet. He doesn’t show emotion because it is a sign of weakness. Depends on which view, he will either be a drinker or smoker. Not always to excess, but knows how to handle his vises. He is good with the ladies as well.

That is all a load of crap.

The problem is that society has bought into it. How many men do you see walking around trying to be the manly man? Always cool and in charge. Kids grow up wanting to be thugs and players. Men want to get ahead and enjoy the good life.

Was your dad anything like this man?

Let me jump over real quick.

God the Father. One of the Trinity yet still God. Not going to get in that argument today though. Why does God identify Himself as the Father? For me, it shows the significance that God has placed on the man / father in a family. Not playing down how critical a mother is, I am saying that the father is a crucial part of the family.

We learn how to relate to men by watching our fathers. We learn how a man should act by watching him as well. If he isn’t there, where do we learn those life lessons from?

My parents got divorced when I was 7. I spent some time with my father, but not a lot. Maybe ever other weekend if no scheduling conflicts came up. My grandfather tried to step up, but he wasn’t saved, so it wasn’t always the best life lessons. For the most part, I saw how men acted in life and on TV. Still not the best role models.

I have more Godly men to surround myself with now, but I am still having to unlearn a lot of unhealthy behaviors. Men, find a men’s group if your not in one. It will help.

With the father out of the relationship, boys don’t grow up knowing what it is like to be a man. Even harder to know what it is like to be a man of God. I think this is why the enemy pushes so hard for these stereotypes to be put out there. Warp the child in the beginning and it is less work later on.

The divorce rate is just ridiculous as well are the number of single mothers. Men are out trying to be “manly” and not sticking around cause they don’t know what a man is supposed to be. There are even studies out there that show that a lot of people who identify as homosexuals can trace that choice back to the role their father played in their life.

We need to stand up and say what is going on isn’t working. It isn’t right. We need to reach out to our friends and family and be a role model. We need to show the men we are around what a man of god is and that is how a man should be. If you know a man who acts like a fool, call him on it. Tell him there is no need for that false machismo attitude around you. Encourage an honest and open environment where a man can express his concerns and issues. Others around you will be going through the same thing. This is a part of your testimony. Don’t deny God of this glory.

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