I am in the process of learning something. Jesus is Lord and Savior.
You would think that would be an easy one to get, but the concept of Lord is foreign to me.
I know Christians like to preach about it, but how many of us actually live it? That is where it gets hard. Who doesn’t want to be in control of their own life? Who really wants to relegate all choices to God? It is great in concept, but that is tough to do. The problem is that is what we are called to do.
The process makes me feel kind of alone. I am trying to submit everything to God and truly not be in control. I am really out of my comfort zone with the process and then I have to wait for God to tell me what His will is? It is a very nerve wracking process. The thoughts still come that question if what I am doing is right. Am I really letting go? Have I let go correctly? What if I am doing it wrong?
I can see why people leave the faith. Deal with these long enough and without an answer, and you feel alone. If I had never had a personal encounter with God, I might think about it too. The thing I hold on to is faith. Faith that God said He would never leave nor forsake me. It doesn’t mean I will always hear His voice, but He is always there.
He shows up too. Not as soon as I would like, but He does show up. I guess it is a faith building exercise. The more I trust in Him, the more I am able to let go. I hope that is how it is supposed to go.