I am like everyone else; I struggle in my daily walk with God. I do not dedicate enough time for prayer or Bible study. I am not always nice to people or help out when I can. I fail daily at being a really great Christian. I fail daily at being a good Christian as well.
God has been showing me that it does not matter what we claim we are, our identity will show in our actions. I am guilt of adding Christianity to my life and not fully committing myself to Him. The concept of being a Christian is tough at times. It is not about doing and it isn’t about not doing. It is a thought process.
How does one still live their life while living for Christ?
I think the simple answer is they don’t.
We still have to live in the world. We have to work and pay our bills. There is a basic level of survival that must be performed or we truly lose our lives. But aren’t we called to lose our life? Isn’t that what Jesus said, if we lost our worldly life, we would find spiritual life. So how does one really balance the two?
Maybe this is a struggle that we all have. I could be alone in this area, but I highly doubt it. The problem that started this was that even though I followed God, I still felt unfulfilled. Something was missing and I was not happy. I have felt broken, but I didn’t know where the break was.
What God was showing me is that I have not fully committed myself to Him. My identity is not first a child of God and then a human. I hold my relationship with God as something near and dear, but it has never been my primary focus. I am working on changing my career path towards ministry and going to school to get more formal education in that area, but it was never my primary focus. I could go through all of the religious trappings trying to fulfill a calling, but if God was never my primary focus, then it did not mean much.
So the new challenge is to make God primary in all areas. It is a struggle. It is easier to function in this life while carrying my Christian card rather than walking the Christian life while trying to function in the world. I am isolating myself from people who’s behaviors are wrong and that I was complacent in tolerating. I am correcting myself in areas that I knew were wrong, like crude jokes or gossip, and trying to walk the path that I know is right. I am not doing these things to make myself righteous, but rather to make the choice of God over the world.